{"product_id":"not-happening-t-shirt-funny-minimalist-slogan-tee","title":"Not Happening T-Shirt — Funny Minimalist Slogan Tee","description":"Crisp, minimalist attitude on a soft, wearable canvas. This lightweight cotton tee carries a deadpan message—quiet, certain, and a little wry—centered on the chest in clean type. It sits close to the body without clinging, with a classic crew neckline and smooth tubular knit that keeps the silhouette simple and unfussy. The feel is breathable and familiar: easy to move in, easy to live in. Wear it on slow mornings, during low-energy days, or when you want to state your mood without saying much at all. The understated design pairs with worn denim, a cozy cardigan, or layered under a jacket for quick, honest dressing when you don’t feel like overexplaining.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eProduct features\u003cbr\u003e- 100% ring-spun cotton (lightweight 153 g\/m²) for a soft, breathable feel\u003cbr\u003e- Tubular knit (no side seams) for a smooth, waste-reducing silhouette\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed, sewn collar with shoulder tape to hold shape and prevent stretching\u003cbr\u003e- Pearlized tear-away label for itch-free comfort; DTG\/DTF printed graphics\u003cbr\u003e- Oeko-Tex certified materials and ethical sourcing (EU 2-year warranty)\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCare instructions\u003cbr\u003e- Do not dryclean\u003cbr\u003e- Do not bleach\u003cbr\u003e- Tumble dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Iron, steam or dry: low heat\u003cbr\u003e- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), with similar colors \u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":53062545670441,"sku":"24097665843684029010","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":53062545703209,"sku":"33677617779512066447","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":53062545735977,"sku":"10565310674583510076","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":53062545768745,"sku":"11877098417275961460","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":53062545801513,"sku":"85119803600745770431","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0957\/6611\/8697\/files\/14024057115238434128_2048.jpg?v=1777330476","url":"https:\/\/grumpities.myshopify.com\/products\/not-happening-t-shirt-funny-minimalist-slogan-tee","provider":"Grumpities","version":"1.0","type":"link"}